June 30, 2022 Special to the Herald Times Opinion 1

Americans have an infatuation with WHEELS, even beyond pulling out the TV tray and watching Vanna White and Wheel of Fortune. Motorized, rubber, wood, gears, water, rocket propelled, side by side, even lawn mowers, anything with wheels. We have it in our DNA, the need to make wheels turn ever faster. Cart wheels became chariots. The toddler’s tricycle was superseded by the plastic HOT WHEELS. More than one parent has been pushed to mental breakdown by the clacking noise of that toy three-wheeler. The lowly riding lawnmower with a one HP Briggs and Stratton engine morphed into a machine with no blade, running around a straw bale lined race course. I have seen groups of riding lawnmowers run in parades by Shriners performing precision maneuvers. The bicycles like the ones repaired by Orville and Wilbur Wright repaired, have become trail bikes with titanium frames and hydraulic shock absorbers made in China and costing thousands of dollars. The horse, as transportation, was doomed as soon as Henry Ford produced an affordable automobile. As soon as the internal combustion engine was practical, we have pushed the limits of wheels. The early rubber tires were, at best, unreliable. My grandfather told me that he rarely made the thirty-mile trip to Denver in his model A without fixing at least one flat. He took the family from Colorado to Oregon once. I can’t imagine how he did it before triple A. Goodyear and others finally made tires reliable and cost effective. Tires went from basic and practical to showy, wide white walls for 1950’s cars that cruised Main Street and was meant to impress girls. Somehow, I really doubt it was the tires that were making the girls giggle.

I made a living working at truck dealerships. Through the years, trucks went from hauling baling wire to chromed vehicles with more accessories than the Queen has jewels. Diesels went from slow, stinky, valve clattering noise makers to racing machines at the dragstrips. Seats became more luxurious than leather easy chairs. Super high lift kits and twenty-inch alloy WHEELS might be impressive to some, but owners would never risk getting a $1500 wheel scratched going off-road. They have seat heaters AND coolers! Some have cameras and programs to back up your truck and trailer with an autopilot. Pickups became mobile offices for construction bosses complete with laptop hookups, WIFI, computer navigation, hands free cell phone. All that’s missing is the electric toothbrush. I have nothing against all that mobile technology, but I do still have a soft spot for riding old steam locomotives with enormous steel wheels. I have never heard anyone tell me that the train was In the repair shop waiting on a computer chip. I WONDER HOW THE STONE AGE WHEEL MAKER WOULD REACT TO VANNA WHITE AND THE WHEEL OF FORTUNE.

By ED PECK – Special to the Herald Times

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